A Christian girl's perspective on whatever movie she happens to be watching.

Sunday, August 28, 2011

Soul Surfer

"When you come back from a loss, beat the odds, and never say never, you find a champion."

Tonight's movie confirmed two things for me:
1. I could never be a surfer,
2. Carrie Underwood can't act.
(But her singing Blessed Be Your Name was fantabulous.)
Soul Surfer is the true story of Bethany Hamilton;
the 13-year-old surfing star whose life radically changes after a shark bites off her left arm. 
That's not going to stop Bethany, however. 
As soon as her stitches are out she's back in the water.
Between harsh competition and a heartbreaking trip to Thailand,
Bethany's whole perspective on life changes, and she learns that 
"Surfing isn't the most important thing in life. Love is."

This really was an amazing movie. 
Sweet, dramatic, heart wrenching, exciting, 
all without a single profanity or blasphemy. 
Just goes to show you don't need to add
 every word in the book to make a great movie.
However, I don't recommend it as a family movie due to the severe lack of clothing. 
Seriously, she's supposed to be 13.
 I wouldn't let my 17- year- old out in her clothes,
 let alone my 13 -year- old.
Oh, and I wasn't a big fan of her sneaking out, in the middle of the night that one time, either. 
(She does seem to be repentant of it afterwards though.)

I really did love this movie. 
I laughed, I cried, 
I really didn't like Melina.. 
But even that worked out in the end. 
The movie's main verse seemed to be Philippians 4:13, 
but in my opinion, the underlying verse was Romans 8:28.
It was an excellent film, perfect for a girls only movie party,
or some other such fun.
I give it five stars.

Currently Yaya is looking for a copy to buy. 
She likes movies too. 

Monday, August 15, 2011


This movie also lacks a tagline.

I watched Rango on Friday night. 
Normally I like to review the movie right after I see it, so I don't forget anything, but I don't think I will have to worry about that with Rango. 
Rango is about a lizard who doesn't seem to have a name or know who he is; therefore he's an actor. His only friends are a wind-up fish, a half of a naked Barbie, and a dead bug.
Through an unusual series of events, the lizard finds himself in a little town called Dirt. This is a fairly normal western town, complete with a pompous little banker, a power hungry mayor, and a cute female lizard with this weird habit of freezing up mid sentence. Rango goes into the town as a no-name, which is an advantage for him, because he can give himself any name he wants. Which he does. The name's Rango. Like Durango, without the Dur. 
With the new name comes a new past. He's the leanest, meanest gunslinger around. And the town people, eager for something to believe in during these hard times, fall for his story and dub him sheriff. Long story short, he fails. Miserably. And then he doesn't fail, saves the town, saves the girl, befriends a fellow legend, and lives happily ever after.
Along with the awesome owl Mariachi band.

This movie is not really family friendly. 
At all.
About half way through the movie I thought to myself
"I think I have been offended in every way possible. No, wait, there haven't been any gay plugs yet."
I thought too soon. 
And then there's all of the idolatry.
Not to mention the language.
PG for mild and brief profanity my foot. 
It may have been mild, 
(Hell was the interjection of choice for the most part, and when that didn't quite fit they said d***)
but it was certainly not brief. They also misused the Lord's Name at least once.
Modesty wise there were a few trashy lizards and the aforementioned naked Barbie half.
The entire movie was laced with several crude remarks.
 (We're not talking typical Shrek humor.)
And besides all that parts of the movie were just weird.

I don't think I would have watched the whole movie had I not been washing dishes while I watched it.
It was annoying, constantly having my ears assaulted.
And it really wasn't all that funny, either.
I don't want to watch it again, and the rest of my family won't be watching it. 
The best part was definitely the Mexican owls.
Overall I'd give it two stars.

Monday, August 8, 2011

Hello Dolly

This movie is severely lacking in tag lines.

I have decided that if I am ever widowed without children, 
I am going to be the next Dolly Levi. 
Minus the crazy attempt to marry the grumpy guy from New York. 
(I can't handle New York accents. I am sorry.)
The lovely and vivacious Dolly has absolutely everything under control. Even if she doesn't have everything under control, she has everything under control. Which is why the desperate young couple, Ermengarde and Ambrose, as well as my two favorite characters, Cornelius and Barnaby, take Dolly's advice and just leave everything to her..
Which results in Cornelius and Barnaby losing their jobs and almost getting arrested. 
Ermehgarde and Ambrose don't seem to fare much better. 
But, leave it to Dolly to have everything work out swimmingly in the end. A little dining, a little dancing, and a good friend who happens to own a fantabulous restaurant are all it takes for this fast talking diva to create a happily ever after for everyone.
Yes. She is my hero.

Ok, ok, she's not my hero. 
But her ability to talk her way out of any awkward situation is a skill that has always amazed me. Of course, with Dolly, it is not uncommon to throw out the occasional lie to help unawkwardize whatever situation it may be. 
(Like one of my favorite parts when Irene's hat shop is "crawling with men!") 
She knows what she is about when it comes to flattering her coloring with her dresses. That purple number she wears was perfection. The famous sparkled gown she wears for the namesake song is rather lowcut. As far as language goes, I wouldn't exactly quote Mr. Vandergelder on twitter. Nothing too serious, but enough to catch my attention.

Hello Dolly is most definitely a classic. 
And why shouldn't it be? Fabulous dancing and singing, which is only to be expected with Gene Kelly 
as the director. 
The movie is positively charming. The storyline is engaging, despite, as my mother said, the characters singing every other line. But, hey, it's a musical. 
And I wouldn't have it any other way. 
I am currently looking for a copy to buy, and give this movie 5stars.
5 out of 5 Stars!

Just saying, my favorite part was the scene where Dolly teaches "28 and 3/4 to dance."

Friday, August 5, 2011

Gnomeo and Juliet

"A little adventure goes a lawn way.."

There's nothing like a tragic romance, is there?
And Shakespeare definitely seemed to know how to pull them off..
I always hated that guy..
Especially in the new movie, 
Gnomeo and Juliet. 
He was such a rude statue! 
Always like "I told you so!"
Anyway, I watched the movie last night,
 and it couldn't have been cuter.
Gnomeo is a total zealot, 
and Juliet should have been a ninja gnome.
They meet, fall in love, are told
"Your love is doomed, your love is dead."
by Juliet's best friend (who thinks it is all positively romantic.) So they sneak off together and decide to run away until they get caught, chased by a crazy fat gnome on a lawn mower, Gnomeo gets smashed, and Juliet gets glued down. 
And then all of them get terminated. 
And then they all live happily ever after. 
Seriously! See, there is this thing called glue...

I'm not an advocate for sneaking behind parents' backs with a relationship by any means. So that's obviously a downer. 
In my opinion forbidden love is only romantic to people who are not forbidden to love. 
(Which is why the real Romeo and Juliet annoys me so much. I mean really, you put them through the pain of not being able to be together with their parents blessing, and then you kill them. What were you thinking, Willie??)
Other than that the movie was awesome. No cussing, no blaspheme, and as they're gnomes, no immodest dressing. Well..  
Except this one male gnome in a speedo was kind of disturbingly ick.
Another ick is the music which is preformed by Elton John and Lady Gaga. Yeah, I don't like either of them, so that was a kind of fail. Crocodile Rock is my little brother's favorite song, so at least he enjoyed it.

The pink flamingo was very cool. He may have been my favorite character. After Gnomeo, of course. 
I do recommend this movie. I found it adorable. (Though, it was a tad hard to get into at first, it caught my attention pretty quickly.) I would definitely see the movie again. In fact, I plan on buying it eventually. 
Overall I'd give it 
Five out of five stars 
5 out of 5 Stars!

Monday, August 1, 2011

That Thing You Do

"In every life there comes a time when that dream you dream
 becomes that thing you do."

Catchy music, 
Fabulous costumes, 
and the gorgeous Liv Tyler!
(No, I'm not talking about Lord of the Rings!)
Last night I saw a movie called That Thing You Do.
Based in the 1960's, a music group goes from playing local talent shows to being the new top singing sensation. 
(After the Beatles, of course.)
Liv Tyler is grand as the adorable costume mistress/
 girlfriend to the lead singer, Faye. 
(Lead singer who happens to be WAY to in too his music.)
Then there is the little drummer boy who loves jazz music and Faye. (He is the smart one, by the way.)
And the cute little marine who mid movie goes to Disney world with some fellow marines and never returns..
And of course, what's a good 60's rock band without the ladies man wanna be? In this case, Lenny, who can't seem to get a date to save his life. After being discovered by a local talent scout, and then turned over to a mega record industry, the boys, Faye, and their new agent
(Who sounds a whole lot like Woody the cowboy),
go on a crazy tour of state fairs, movie sets, and TV appearances. It was after that last one things started to fall apart. 
The Marine guy takes the aforementioned trip to Disney, Lenny gets married (I know, right?), Shades gets to play a duet with his favorite jazz player, and Faye gets heartbroken.

The movie was adorable. 
The costumes were modest for the most part, 
though you might want to watch out for 
the background dancers later on. 
(While nowadays they'd be considered modest, they still reveal more skin than I'd let my little brothers see.)
Language wise, I don't remember any profanities. 
(But I don't promise.)
There are a few places in which among shouts of joy and disbelief they may have misused the Lord's Name, but I honestly couldn't tell. I would play it safe and just mute it anytime someone looks like they're about to start screaming for joy.

Guy (aka Shades), had this slightly crazy way of randomly stating that he was Spartacus, and Tom Hank's wife makes an appearance as the chick that introduces Guy to his hero. Really, other than that there's not much else to say. 
I liked the movie a lot, and I would totally watch it again. 
It was kind of lame and awesome at the same time. 
And apparently it was based on a true story. 
   Overall I'd give it
 Three out of five stars.
Rated 3.0 out of 5.0
(Warning: "That Thing You Do" will be that song you sing the rest of the day.)